Supporting Someone in Drug Rehab?

Question by Jango: Supporting someone in drug rehab?
My sister’s going into a private rehab facility for heroin addiction. She made the choice herself and has been on methadone for 2 months since she quit. So she’s coming off the methadone now. How can I support and encourage her while she’s in there? Loneliness seems to be a big aspect of her feeling terrible at the moment and she really seems to want her family right now (my parents are completely supporting her). How can I help ensure she doesn’t quit and makes it through? She’ll be in rehab for a month and something akin to a medical hotel for 5 months after that. My only addiction in life has been cigarettes so I can’t imagine what it must be like for her. Are there any recovered/recovering addicts that can share some help on this?

I really appreciate your responses. Thanks.

Best answer:

Answer by Thomas G
Well, she needs you…and that’s about it. Just being there is around 90% of it all, really.

You really find out who your friends are when you are down and out. Blood is thicker than water, just be there for sis…l i s t e n to her. Don’t offer TOO much what I would do stuff, but gently suggest. Encourage her that she is going to be ok and that you are there. If it takes you being more involved in her post treatment life, so be it. She will need y’all more than ever after she gets out!

Answer by micheleann62
Its good that your sister is reaching out to family. The best you can do right now is visit, write letters and make phone calls. Unless it is for something specific and under 20.00 dollars don’t offer money and best to buy it rather than giving cash to your sister directly. I trust the person but not the addiction.
When you correspond with her, DON’T bring up any crisis concerning her kids (if she has them) a boyfriend or husband, any family pressures or bad things concerning a friend or friends. Your sister can only deal with her own issues at present. She may assume undue guilt or guilt she isn’t emotionally prepared to amend at this time.
Encourage her by praising her for the effort she is making and let her know you see that it is very brave to do treatment. Don’t ask about her future plans unless she brings them up, like what she will do for a job, or where she will live or paying back a debt. She can handle things one day at a time, one issue at a time and its her call. Try not to bring up her past or how much trouble she has caused in the family. She will get to that part of her recovery on her own and if it is put upon her prematurely, she may give up and think she has done so much damage, she can’t possibly rise above it.
When she talks about legal hassles or bills etc, just tell her she will have time to work things out and to take it one day at a time. Let her know her family is emotionally supportive and will help if they can and if it benefits her and her recovery. Remind her that she can get through anything as long as she remains clean and sober. Don’t go into long litanys. She is aware that you haven’t the foggiest what addiction is like or how difficult recovery is sometimes. Just be a listener unless she asks for advice. When you don’t know, simply say “I don’t know but maybe your sponor or a friend in the (NA) program does.”
Encourage NA meetings about the time she is ready for discharge. You may offer to go to “open “meetings with her but don’t insist. Let her know you are there if she needs you but if its too private you are okay with not going. Don’t drill EVER about if she goes to meetings or if she got a sponsor. She will tell you when she gets a sponsor. If you are at a meeting with her where sponsorship is the topic the its okay to ask her if she has selected someone yet. If she says “no” you can only ask if she is looking. If she says “no” drop it!! There is a fine line especially to the sensitive addict between suggestion and encouragement versus nagging and control.
You and your parents need to be in Naranon or Alanon at best. There are also Codependents Anonymous. The family deserves to heal and will need guidance on how to live with an addict, recovery or not, and keep healthy themselves. God bless you and I hope you will let me know how things work out. Some of us are miracles!

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